• NBC Coverage
• TMZ Coverage
• TMZ Coverage 2
• US Magazine Coverage

Though I do find it offensive that a Turkish entity is using an Armenian for the purpose of profit (selling magazines in this case), I am not offended by Kim Kardashian being on the cover of the April issue of the Turkish Cosmo. Why? I feel like this is a sign of triumph over the Genocide. 96 years ago on April 24, 1915 the Turkish government tried to wipe out the Armenian people and now here we are on the covers of their magazines. It is almost a tribute to our resilience. Hell, I wish Armenians were on the covers of all Turkish magazines this month.

If you want to learn more about the Armenian Genocide check out my previous post series talking about it.

“All pasts are like poems; one can derive a thousand things, but not live in them”
-John Fowles

What runs all day and never walks,
Often murmurs, never talks;
It has a bed and never sleeps;
It has a mouth and never eats.

Guesses?

Answer: A River.

This week’s time waster?  Something very short and simple.  This awesome video about a new image resizing technology.  I know it sounds boring, but take a quick look, imagine how much greater images can look on small devices like your cell phone or PDA if this technology was used!  Tech news is always a favorite time waster of mine.  Next week I’ll get into some of my favorite tech news sources.

“Timeshares are NOT to be regarded as sound investments”

How many times do we have to explain this to you people?

Please take a moment to remember all those Armenians who lost their lives during this terrible Genocide.

I was reading up on cities and problems within them and here’s my summary concerning the above.

Large urban areas are plagued with gridlock, especially cities with sprawling suburbs. Most residents feel the solution to the traffic issues would be expanding the freeway system. Even though this sounds good it would be costly, take a long time to complete, and would persuade street users to switch to the “new” freeways. Cities are trying to change resident lifestyle habits rather than building or improving all the freeways. Here are the things we could all do (and cities want us to do) to reduce traffic and increase our gas efficiency.

1. Work close to home or move closer to work.
With more residents moving to suburbs and suburbs expanding further and further out from the cities core people are commuting further to work. This means people are staying on the roads longer. This not only puts a dent in your wallet because of gasoline and car maintenance, but also means that you are spending more time on already congested freeways. Working closer to where you live means using less fuel and remaining on congested freeways for shorter periods of time.

2. Carpool.
We all know how this works. Your drive with other commuters put less cars on congested roads and using less gasoline.

3. Drive during off-peak times.
Another strategy that cities would like residents to use is to travel to and from work (or other places) at off peak times. This means that even though we have the same amount of traffic it is spread out during a longer period of time making it less congested. Not only does this make everyone’s commute shorter but if you drive at an off-peak time you probably will be in your car for a shorter amount of time and in smoother traffic, which will conserve gasoline.

4. Have commercial deliveries completed during off-peak times.
Same idea as #3 but about deliveries. Deliveries usually interrupt the flow of traffic and keeping these out of peak hours would improve the flow of traffic during those times.

5. Drive fuel efficient vehicles.
This doesn’t improve traffic, but when you are going to purchase your next vehicle try to get one that is somewhat fuel efficient. This will help our gasoline consumption

Other things you can do or help your city do:
-walk to close locations (your friends house down the street, lunch at work)
-ask your city to have unnecessary stop signs removed.
-ask your city to optimize its traffic lights to keep the flow of traffic moving during peak hours.
-Try to work from home or telecommute on some days.

For more about Fuel Efficiency you can check out FuelEconomy.gov

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don�t lose my head
They crawl in like a cockroach leaving babies in my bed
Dropping little reels of tape to remind me that I�m alone
Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home
There’s a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain
An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?
And will you never say that you love me just to put it in my face?
And will you never try to reach me?
It is I that wanted space

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me so you can finally see what�s good for you

I�m sober now for 3 whole months it�s one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won�t touch again
In a sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I�ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn�t do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what�s good for you

And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes crying and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling �make it go away!�
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered �How can you do this to me?�

Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn�t do for you

Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what�s good for you

Number 9 – Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
Number 8 – Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

Number 7 – Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won’t bother you for weeks.

Number 6 – Some people are like a Slinky…not really good for anything, but you still can’t help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

Number 5 – Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Number 4 – All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Number 3 – Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

Number 2 – In the 60′s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006 -
We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America but we haven’t got a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of homeland security

“Life may not be the party we hoped for … but while we’re here we might
as well dance!”

Dear President Bush:
I’m about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family,
and I would like to ask you to assist me. I’m going to walk across
the border from the U.S. into Mexico, and I need to make a few
arrangements. I know you can help with this.

I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports,
immigration quotas and laws. I’m sure they handle those things the
same way you do here. So, would you mind telling your buddy,
President Vicente Fox, that I’m on my way over? Please let him know
that I will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need,
whether I use them or not.
3. All government forms need to be printed in English.
4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.
5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.
6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the
flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.
7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and
lunch.
8. I will need a local Mexican driver’s license so I can get easy
access to government services.
9. I do not plan to have any car insurance, and I won’t make any
effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the
memo from Pres. Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all
police officers speak English.
11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house top, put flag decals
on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not
want any complaints or negative comments from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes,
and don’t enforce any labor laws or tax laws.
13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice
and never say a critical word about me, or about the strain I might
place on the economy.

I know this is an easy request because you already do all these
things for all the people who come to the U.S. from Mexico. I am
sure that Pres. Fox won’t mind returning the favor if you ask him
nicely.

However, if he gives you any trouble, just invite him to go quail
hunting with your V.P.

Thank you so much for your kind help.

Sincerely, John Q. Public

“I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said as he walked up to her, “but in just a week or two, my father will die, and I’ll inherit 20 million dollars.”

Impressed, the woman went home with him that evening and, three days later,she became his stepmother.

Women are so much smarter than men.