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Mofomon

Pure Awesomeness… Sort Of…

Archive for July, 2005

Garbage…Rocks my World.

Garbage Concert
Alrighty…so last night I went to a garbage concert in orange county..

THIS WAS THE BEST CONCERT I HAVE EVER BEEN TO.
Not only was the weather great, but i had great company, great music, annndddd I touched Shirley Manson since she chose to go running down my aisle.

Did I mention I was in the 12th row.
That concert was awesome.

Too bad I didnt even take my camera. LOL.

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fixed

Fixed the stupid blog bug, and revamped the place.

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ugh

Stupid Blog Is bugged…and creates the huge space.

And i lost the lyrics i wanetd to post here.

Oh well.

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Think Before you Speak

Got this from an email this morning….
Here are 6 reasons why you should think before you speak – the last one is great!

FIRST TESTIMONY:

I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, “How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?” I turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn’t say a word…he knew better.

SECOND TESTIMONY:

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women’s type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, “I think I like playing with men’s balls.”

THIRD TESTIMONY:

My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts! . As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, “No, I’m just looking at your nuts.” My sister started to laugh hysterically. The boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH TESTIMONY:

While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she did not start behaving “right now” she would be punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, “If you don’t let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy’s pee-pee last night!” The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were ! doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

FIFTH TESTIMONY:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said “No”. I kept thinking “Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don’t have any clothes with me.” Then ! I said, “Danny, are you SURE you didn’t have an accident?” “No,” he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, “Danny, did you have an accident?” This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled “SEE MOM, IT’S JUST FARTS!!” While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they’d ever had!

LAST TESTIMONY:

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks.

We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn’t, turned to the weatherman and asked: “So Bob, where’s that 8 inches you promised me last night?” Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!

Now, didn’t that feel good?
Pass it on to someone you know who needs a laugh!

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Children explain love.

What does Love mean?
A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8
year-olds, “What does love mean?” The answers they got were
broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined.
See what you think:

“When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over
and paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her
all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That’s love.”
Rebecca- age 8

When someone loves you, the way they say your name is
different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.”
Billy – age 4

“Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on
shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other.”
Karl – age 5

“Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of
your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.”
Chrissy -age 6

“Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.”
Terri – age 4

“Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she
takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.”
Danny – age 7

“Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired
of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My
Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss”
Emily – age 8

“Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop
opening presents and listen.”
Bobby – age 7 (Wow!)

“If you want to learn to love better, you should start with
a friend who you hate,”
Nikka – age 6

“Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday.”
Noelle – age 7

“Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are
still friends even after they know each other so well.”
Tommy – age 6

“During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared.
I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and
smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn’t scared anymore.”
Cindy – age 8

“My mommy loves me more than anybody . You don’t see anyone
else kissing me to sleep at night.”
Clare – age 6

“Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.”
Elaine-age 5

“Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still
says he is handsomer than Robert Redford.”
Chris – age 7

“Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left
him alone all day.”
Mary Ann – age 4

“I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her
old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones.”
Lauren – age 4

“When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and
little stars come out of you.” (what an imagination)
Karen – age 7

“Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn’t
think it’s gross.”
Mark – age 6

“You really shouldn’t say ‘I love you’ unless you mean it.
But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.”
Jessica – age 8

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mm

hmmmm

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